This particular blog is all about Religion and my understanding of the relationship between God and me. If you're not interested in reading about this relationship then now would be a good time to stop reading. I just felt the need to put something down on paper. (Lockdown is doing strange things to us all). The Christians, and indeed non-Christians, that I know are welcome to comment.
I THINK I believe in God. In the concept of a creator, who created everything all those billions of years ago and allowed the universe and everything in it and on it to evolve to where we are today.
But He makes it SO difficult for me to believe. In the bible He, or His angels, personally appeared to so many people with different messages. It seems as though I am not worthy of a visitation. If He could only give me some kind of sign then I could KNOW I believe in Him. My faith keeps wavering and I know it would be so easy for Him to send a sign and bring me on board so that my faith could be as strong as a rock. I often wonder why He chooses not to 'talk' to me.
Revelation 3:20. Jesus said: "Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and
opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with
me." I opened the door about 4 years ago. I am still waiting for him to come in and talk to me. Jesus, where are you?
While I have your attention God, I wonder if you could tell me whether I need to pray out loud or whether praying in my mind is sufficient? Surely if you are omniscient you know what I am thinking?
I understand that the concept of a Creator who can see/interact with all 7.8 billion inhabitants of this planet at the same time, and all the animals as well, is a difficult concept to get one's head around. I personally think in terms of looking down on an anthill where you can see lots of activity going on all the time. I can then imagine up-scaling that so that God can look down on everything at once.
Can I briefly mention determinism while I'm here. The theory that all events, including moral choices, are completely determined by previously existing causes. It is is usually understood to preclude free will because it entails that humans cannot act otherwise than they do. Imagine, if you will, that it doesn't matter what course of action you choose or take as everything has already been pre-ordained. A bit like a giant book of the Universe and the pages are slowly being turned by 'the Architect'. I am ready to accept that as a philosophy.
To sum up then, am I to understand that I have to believe in order to have any chance of redemption? Even if I say "OK, I believe" without meaning it He will know if I'm only pretending and will close the door in my face on the Day of Judgement (even though He himself has chosen not to send me proof positive).
To use a hackneyed cliche - we are where we are. Forgive the incoherent ramblings of this pseudo-Christian. I will keep going to Church and Bible Study and hope that one day he will somehow send me a message to convince me of his existence.
Now I can't put off Spanish homework any longer!
Morning Des, I sent you a response to the above blog, last night. I am not clever enough to see if you received it or if it vanished into the ether. Regards Liz
ReplyDeleteFB comment from D.S.
ReplyDeleteI’d say, keep on inviting him in, Des - but you need to be ready for a revolution he’ll bring about in your life - and if you don’t want that he’ll probably delay accepting the invitation. (It’s a good revolution - I’ve never regretted his turning my own life right-way-up!)
Science leads to the conclusion that all is determined in a closed system of cause-and-effect. But we know we are free. Which is why there were two branches to the Enlightenment, the rational, scientific one and the Romantic Movement, which emphasised the human side of life. Philosophy since then has tried to resolve this conundrum. One good way of describing the situation was given by my late friend, Prof Donald MacKay, Christian apologist of ability as well as physicist and brain scientist (at Keele University): Think of a television, he used to say; the laws of physics completely describe the electronics of the set. But the picture you watch is governed by the programming of the TV company, which uses the electronics but is not remotely governed by it. So the electronics constitute a closed system, but the programming a quite different, but open, one. There is no conflict.
FB comment from C.S.
ReplyDeleteReally enjoyed reading this Des, I think (believe) along the same lines as you. Determinism, and faith. My one-sided conversation with Him tends to be thought rather than spoken out loud, and in nature rather that in church.
WhatsApp comment from P.M.
ReplyDeleteThanks Des. That's a brave, honest and insightful post and I respect you greatly for it.
What is 'Belief'? A decision, not taken lightly (I hope), sets our future thinking in a matter. We can't hold everything in limbo, our minds could not cope with total uncertainty in everything, there lies madness. We decide our views on matters to put them to rest and so we can carry on.
When it comes to God we have a special problem. A decision to make with very conflicting evidence. We go with what makes sense, given what we know. For me, the idea of the 'Big Bang' seemed so ridiculous that here had to be a more convincing explanation, that the universe was formed by someone who really knew what they were doing, When you look at the scientific constants needed to keep it in balance, it's mind boggling. Why such a massive, really massive universe to have just one tiny speck hosting intelligent life? For that life to develop over (to us) a really long time makes us either totally inconsqeuential or the most amazingly important thing to have happened in our, probably miserable, comphrension. What's all that about?
The image of God in vaguely human form, sitting on a cloud and dispensing justice to those who ask fervently doesn't convince me. We want to anthropamorphise God as we're told that we are made in His image. That's patently a big problem. God doesn't age and therefore doesn't have an age as we understand it. Doesn't have a form or a gender or a 'place' to be. Getting my head around eternity, i.e. no time, omnipresence and omnipotence are pretty far out. The important thing is His character, that's the germ we hold. It's found in the good we do and obscured by the bad. We have always had the idea of good and evil, Hollywood depends on it but we can also see that it is a balance, more good = better world and vice versa. Follow that to it's conclusion and we can create heaven on earth, if only it wasn't for the bay guys, the bad in us all being allowed to prevail.
So, it makes sense for God to exist, otherwise it's all totally pointless, short and it doesn't matter how we behave.
I'd rather be on the winning side, especially knowing that the losing side is most definitely losing.
Why doesn't God seem to hear us, or if He does why don't we feel it or hear from Him? Because he wants us to work it out for ourselves. Like we are in an exam and the most competent will pass, or a challenge where you have to find the route to survival. If we are given the answers beforehand or a map then it's meaningless. If we have to go through the process of working out what's the 'right' thing to do to earn our stripes then we choose to devote ourselves to the challenge or we just lie down and give up.
If my faith turned out to be a sham then I would still be way ahead of those who preferred to cheat and connive to have a marginally better little existance for this short time. I'd have the richness of love from and for those around me, the clear concience and the pleasure of leaving the earth better for my little contribution. But what a prize I look forward to, beyond my wildest imaginings. An existence that makes our current situation inconsequential, rocking around on a speck of dust for a few nanoseconds in a crazily vast universe. Me? I'll go with the winners.
WhatsApp comment from L.V.
ReplyDeleteDear Des.
God must love you because we find ourselves loving you. Like Debbie said. Don’t let Him go. Keep on reading about Him as Father, Son and Spirit of holiness, in His word. Be less concerned about what you feel or understand - self knowledge made even Adam and Eve, who drowned in only His love and goodness day by day, believe the deceiver to want more knowledge of how good and evil works and all it did: they became more independent and further away from Him. He is revealing Himself in His word. The more you read the more He reveals, for He is His word.
The seed -reading His word- will plant in you, will give Him something to work with in your mind.
It brings a paradigm shift from wanting to be understood because we feel like Adam, that He is keeping something from us to: understanding Him as being God. The God of unfathomable love who is to be trusted with your eternal destiny.
Not any man nor you, nor more, mere knowledge can save you. Only He can and wants to. It might take time in your eyes but He is outside of time.
I know this wrestling match with Him. I am praying for you not to give up - till He wins and become as clear as light.
Edited comments from me on WhatsApp
ReplyDeleteMany thanks for your comments on my 'God blog'. They are all very much appreciated, especially the erudite and eloquent comments from P and L. Taking them all together there was a powerful synergy almost like a magnetic field drawing me closer to the fold. I'm prepared to believe that the Holy Spirit was talking to me, through you. If nobody objects I plan to cut and paste your comments to the bottom of my blog so that everything is in one place to look at the next time my faith wavers.
A comment from Liz added on 10th April that I have only just found. I have, of course, left out her contact details. Hi Des, I am blessed by having been sent a link to your blogspot by a friend who lives in Spain. I am sure she us not expecting me to respond and I trust that this is not a breach of confidence. I feel a witness to share the following with you. Your plight is not unusual. In that you clearly understand redemption as a requirement to avoid damnation. That, indeed, is a valid motivation. However, it is not going to get you any brownie points in the grand scheme of things. Redemption is so much more than a ticket out of hell. But in order to understand this, we need to understand who Jesus is. Once you know Him as the person He is, you will understand the reason why He really did give you a choice to serve Him and once you grasp that it is indeed a choice, you will understand your purpose. By then, you will want nothing more than to be in that number. I promise you this, He does listen, He does see and He is omniscient. He wants you to love Him with all your heart, your body, your soul and your mind. He will talk to you as soon as you ask the right question. The answer in in His WORD. Romans 10:17. If you are serious about seeking an answer to your quest, I would be delighted to work through this with you. I happen to know, personally, the most powerful man who ever walked on this earth. He is the best friend I could ever have and He wants you to join us. We are inclined to build a set of paranetres that suit our lifestyle to which we expect God to conform. It is perhaps time to rethink that box. You may w/app me on .... We can do this together. Much love in Christ Liz.
ReplyDelete